Thursday, 8 October 2009



(Have I begun a post with that before? Probably.)


Okay. So I now live in the United States of America.



I am living... in... the USA. It's true. At least, I keep telling myself it's true. About ninety-seven percent of my brain can't grasp it. The remaining three percentile are about to perform a strike action caused by the majority's refusal to accept.

It's problematic.

With the impending withdrawal of the comprehending three percent, I face complete regression into a state of infantile denial - a mentally induced 'pre-America' stasis of sorts. I fear I will insist on driving on the left (whilst sat in the passenger seat); continue to seek methods of TV tax avoidance, asserting that my actions are legit; scream at the spell-checker's inability to spell; assume health care is a basic human right that everyone receives (no matter how rubbish the health care service may be); expect the date to be presented in a logical string of numbers going from the smallest unit (i.e. the day) to the largest (i.e. the year); and put milk in my tea. Which I do anyway.

Luckily I'm currently surviving on an instinct that doesn't require the forward-thinking minority of my brain at all. I generally refer to this instinct as HOLIDAY MODE. HOLIDAY MODE is fun because it's a state of suspended functionality. Useful, everyday functions become obscenely difficult, enabling me to put huge, stockpiled resources into loafing and doing not much. Of course, HOLIDAY MODE wasn't designed to be an ongoing habitude.

This all leaves me somewhat concerned. Yet, despite the three percentile, despite HOLIDAY MODE, I'm beginning to suspect my westward transistion will, in fact, never truly have the impact that I am so fearfully awaiting. At least, conceivably, not in the ways I might expect.

To phrase it differently : I wonder, maybe, if I have perhaps landed on my feet?

Honestly, it's hard to tell. I'm having such a good time right now. With so many things on the horizon (er, wedding?), it's leaving me with little to gauge how I'm doing overall. (You know. As a person. With emotions and stuff.) I have objectives - but not too many. There are new friends and faces. There are computer games. There is sunshine, and the bluest and most strikingly beautiful skies I have ever bothered to notice. Sometimes there are thunderstorms, but that's cool too. I regularly communicate and interact with friends and family back home. It's all gravy.

The thing is, life doesn't feel like a grind. It's not a generic forward movement. And I'm loving it.

That's all that really matters, right?

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